The Mysterious INFJ
A critical step in the reliable use of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is verification of type through a dialogue between the individual completing the inventory and the practitioner 
interpreting the results. After receiving the results, the client will read the description of the personality type, in the aggregate, to determine if it is largely accurate. In my experience, I have found the INFJ notoriously difficult to type. Even after the verification step, the INFJ can be uncertain that this description fits. It isn’t due to shortcomings in the Myers-Briggs questionnaire. It is mainly due to the rarity and complexity of the INFJ type.
Exact percentages vary but the INFJ, the rarest of the personality types, is said to account for 1-2% of the overall population, females slightly more often than males. The INFJ has been called “The Mystic,” “The Counselor,” and “Empath”. They are described as original, gentle, caring, and highly intuitive. The quality of extrasensory perception, or ESP, is often attributed to them. People who have known INFJs for years continue to be surprised when yet another layer of their complex personality is revealed. As a result of their inferior sensing function, they can be stubborn and obsess about an inconsequential detail , usually when they are under stress. Their ability to see the big picture can be affected during these times. INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they are so genuinely interested in people — a product of the auxiliary feeling function they most readily show to the world (Introverts show their auxiliary function, or the function that supports the dominant function, to the world first). Still, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or mate. Yet, INFJs will suddenly withdraw into themselves, sometimes shutting out those closest to them. This apparent about face is necessary, providing both time to rebuild their energy and a filter to prevent the emotional overload that can happen as they deeply experience other individuals. This is perhaps the most confusing aspect of the enigmatic INFJ character to outsiders particularly if experience with this type has been limited. I have 3 INFJ’s in my life, my brother, my daughter, and my best friend and I can attest to the fact that they are like Russian nesting dolls, when one doll is exposed, another one lies inside.
Today I saw the Magnificent Mr. O (due to privacy laws I can’t reveal his name but the “O” stands for optimism) who clearly has had more than his share of trials in life. In his late 20’s, he was diagnosed with a lymphoma requiring surgery and radiation to his neck. The resulting scar tissue caused his carotid artery to narrow so at the age of 44, he suffered a massive stroke leaving the left side of his body paralyzed and his doctors skeptical that he would ever walk again. Along with that came cognitive deficits that impaired his ability to return to his job as a top executive in a large company. After taking not one but two major hits in his life, it would be understandable for this man to give up and accept his limitations. But the prospect of being unable to walk or return to meaningful work was far more frightening to him than the effort and attitude it would take get better….
Recently I heard someone declare the “F” word to be the most versatile word in the English language. Insert it anywhere! I am so “F-ing” sick of those “F-ing” refs! What the “F” ?!! “F” this! “F” that! What an “F-er”! Oh “F”! That’s “F-ing” sick!! I saved the “F-ing” turtle! (I actually heard a kid belt that one out after he helped a turtle cross the road). You get my drift. My opinion of the “F” word? It’s a coarse word that anyone with intelligence or class should avoid. Yet we all use it, myself included,at my weakest moments. And it worries me….
It seems that every time I want to add something to my home office, I find myself asking why it always has to be so difficult! In my day, the only thing you had to worry about was finding an outlet to plug the device into. You never had to ask, “Why is this component not recognizing that component?” Bah!!! Where is my sledgehammer?
